Itch you can't scatch

I'm confused, i don't even know what i want anymore, all these frustrations and confusions, i'm like a bomb, just waiting to go off.

My hair. Remember how much i loved my new style,well, it's gone horrible and thick again this morning. Apparently i wasnt supposed to blow dry it.

I haven't eaten properly today, didn't eat until like 3 o'clock, after i had bathed and gone shop etc. I've eaten small bowl of coco pops and ice cream nd yorkshire pud.

Alive was certainly a new experience last night. Fun, but the oopsite of mollifying. The girls, mostly, had the shortest skirts, bodycon basically, and it was unnatural. I felt so curvy and big and old, with all the young, pretty girls with their perfectly coloured (i'm too pale) twig legs. It was incredible, how they kept their skirts/dresses from hiding up. I guess they couldn't bend over. At one point, when sitting down, i saw a girl's crack, not pleasant at all.

Clubbing, or whatever it's called, is fun though. Better if you're in a group, so there are more people you know. It's so loud, when you leave the room, to go outside or something, you can't hear properly. Like when you're in the bath and your ears are underwater and you speak. At Alive, at one point, my nose was vibrating, very random. Nikii liked the bubbles, she got a kaliedascope thrown at her.
You get so sweaty, and it's so crowded, all the other sweaty people accidently rubbing up against you, pretty gross.

I've realised why i like reading so much. Reading means i escape into someone else's 'life', their world, their problems, their 'happy endings'.